The Day That Gambit Was Irresistable
by Blimey The Toad
Summary: Read the title, numb nuts!
1. Hot Lovin' For The Sexy Cajun

THE DAY THAT GAMBIT WAS IRRESISTABLE!!! (to even non-Gambette's! Wow!)  
  
Don't ask... I just got this freaky idea... and... er. Well...   
I don't own 'em... nope, not a one.   
Summary: Read the dang TITLE!!! Pah!  
Hot damn, this is short! Sorry, ya'll.   
  
One fine and sunny morning, about 11am (it was a Sunday-no danger room practice on the sabbath for the X-tian X-Men), Remy LeBeau, also known as Gambit when in X-Men mode, woke up. He stretched out his long limbs, ran his fingers through his thick reddish-brown hair, and smiled contentedly. He felt about the same as always, but something was different. Something...  
He hopped out of bed and walked to the kitchen in his silent-thief way. The lone occupant of the kitchen was Scott, who was rumaging through the cupboards, looking for god knows what. Gambit walked up behind him and tapped him on his shoulder, scaring the crap out of him.   
Scott wheeled around, screeching "What the... who the... grr-" and paused, looking at Remy. A brief smile touched the corners of his mouth, then faded, and was replaced with a look of... desire, perhaps?  
Non, thought Gambit. Non, never! I must be malfunctioning... maybe my empathy's wrong...   
But he knew, even if his powers were malfunctioning, his experiance was not. "Scott... Cyclops... homme... non, you no wan' ta do dis!" He cried as Scott lunged at him. "Gambit, I never realized how..." but he didn't finish as his lips closed down on Remy's.   
"Gad!" cried Gambit, and pushed him away. "You not t'inkin'! Geez-us!" Gambit broke into a sprint into the hall, with Scott on his heels, calling "Gambit, my love, where are you going? Playing hard to get? Tee hee...". Luckily, Gambit's longer legs and faster speed won out. He bolted outside as Scott's calling got softer, then went out. He leaned against the door panting, and tried desparately to comprehend what just happened. He saw Storm watering some corn, and went to her (mmm... corn. You can tell what I'm craving.)   
"Holy crap, Stormy! Scotty just tried to *attack* me! He jumped on me and-and-and *kissed* me! Yech!" Gambit was flushed and apparently very confused and overwhelmed by Scott's actions. He looked at Storm pleadingly, hoping beyond hope that she knew about some prank that involved Scott trying to kiss him or something. Storm's eyes hazed over and she walked over to Gambit, saying, "Well, I remember someone saying..." and she leaned in like she was going to whisper something in his ear. But alas, she did not. She leaned in closer, and closer, until... "Smooooch."  
Gambit pulled out of Storm's grasp as well. "Stormy, I t'ink of you like a sister! Why you kiss me!?" But Storm was up again, with desire written all over her face, her body language screaming to him. He ran. Fast and far away. Unfortuneatly, Storm can fly. And thus, she caught up, and tackled him from behind. The breath was knock out of Gambit, but before his breathing could return to normal, Storm's lips and mouth covered his own.  
"Eep!" Gambit pulled away and ran away again, quickly, back towards the mansion, hoping the professor could help him figure out what was wrong. Storm followed again, but in her unwavering watching of him, she hit a tree and was knocked out. At least temporarily.   
Gambit piled into the door, gasping and panting, and took off again to professor's office before he could think another thought.  
*Squeak-SLAM!* He ran into the office, and jumped onto the long couch that Xavier had had for as long as Remy could remember. "Merde!" He stared at the couch until he regained his composure, then slowly lifted his head to see the professor. However, when he saw the professor, he was in the process of removing his shirt.  
"Uh... Xavier? Um, Charley? Yikes!" Gambit tried to run, but couldn't. *Damnit*, he thought, *Xavier's telepathy! I can't move! No! How do I get out of this one?* Gambit racked his brain, but came up with no answer. He waited in fearful anticipation of the coming events. He closed his eyes tight, and suddenly Mae West slipped into his mind.  
Oh, hell! Gambit cried to himself. I know what's wrong!  
  
Alright, not my best I'll admit. But the idea wouldn't go away. :( Anyways, I was watching E!'s Mysteries and Scandals on Mae West when I wrote part of this. So she has a role. Uh, if I get reviews, you see what happens. If I don't, or if the reviews urge me to back away from the typewriter until this idea goes away, I guess I won't continue there, either. Uh... thanx, ya'll!  
BTW, where is everyone from? Like, I guess this is an age/sex/location check. I'm just kinda curious... 


	2. Oh My! Mama West?

BTW, ya'll... I'm 17/f/Fayetteville, AR Thanx to all ya'll who answered!  
  
The Day That Gambit Was Irresistable II  
  
No own do I. Owned by Marvel they are, yes.  
Uh... a continuation from last time: Let me recap-everyone thinks Gambit is hot. Mae West is involved. How? Like this...  
BTW, Tsunami-Angel... that was a really good guess. Wow.  
  
*Oh, hell!* Gambit cried to himself. *I know what's wrong!*  
  
Suddenly Rogue burst into the room, a horrified expression on her face. "Oh mah God, professor! Put on some clothes!" She flew to Gambit before Xavier could react and stick her there, too, then flew quickly up to her room. She closed the door, then turned to him.   
"What's goin' on, Remy?" Rogue eyes looked confused. "I saw what Storm did and came to find you right quick. Then Xavier..." She trailed off. "What exactly is goin' on?"  
Gambit met her eyes with his own, then answered her with his hypothesis. "I t'ink my charm power be goin' crazy. I feel somet'ing strange dis morning, but it no feel too dangerous. Den Scott try to kiss Gambit-"  
Rogue cut him off. "What?!? Did ah miss something? Are ya sayin' Scott, as in Cyclops, as in leader of the X-Men, husband to Jean, Xavier's little teacher's pet Scott tried to kiss you?" She looked appalled and a tad disbelieving.  
"Chere, you got to trust me... you see what Storm did. An' Xavier..." He shuddered, then turned back to her. "An' I t'ink Mae West got somet'ing to do wit' it." He glanced around suspiciously.   
"Gambit, are you talkin' born 1893, died 1980, American sex-icon of the 30's and early 40's, platwrite and actress Mae West?"  
"Uh huh."  
"Umm... yeah. Gambit, Mae West died in 1980. She couldn't have anything to do with it."  
  
Suddenly, a vulptuous blonde woman stepped through the doorway.  
"Oh, couldn't I? Honey, you have a lot of things to learn."  
Rogue eys went wide, and she passed out.  
  
As Gambit laid Rogue out on her bed until she woke up, he turned to Mae West. "Why you come here? Why you do dis to me? Huh? Why?"  
She gave a compassionate smile, and patted his hand. "Remy, I know you never knew your real family. You were taken from them at an early age. I... well, Remy... have you ever noticed that sometimes you have this... charm power over people? People find you attractive, but... not just that. More attractive then they would normally?"  
"Yeah, I noticed that. I actually call it my charm-power. I t'ought it kind of a branch from my empathy power."  
"No, Remy. You have a power possessed by few. It runs in the veins of one family in the States. The West family."  
"Huh?"  
"Remy, you are my great grandson."  
"But... but... I... wait a minute! You don't got any children!"   
She rolled her eyes at him. "Yeah, and I'm a guy, too. The damned media doesn't know anything. Remember that. Anyways, who's the girl. Pretty little thing."  
"Yeah," responded Gambit. "She be my girlfriend, I guess. But we be separated. She de only girl I could ever see bein' wit' forever. But, she don' wan' ta marry me... she don't love me, I guess."  
"Don't worry, Remy. You know how it is: it's easy to get married, but hard to stay that way. Maybe you're better off, you think?"  
He shrugged, then looked up to her.  
"I used to have control over it, den no more. What did you do t'me? And why it not affect Rogue?"   
"Well, I put a mental dampener on that particular part of your power, to see if you were the right one. I had to make sure I found you before I told you who I was. It would be downright akward to tell the wrong person. The reason why it didn't work on Rogue, well... the answer will come in time."  
Remy just shrugged again. "Why you visit me? To give me answers about my past?"  
She just laughed. "No, honey! To bug you to death. You'll have no control until you can figure out where I am. When you figure it out, come up and see me sometime. Then I'll let you have control again. Until then, let's hope this Logan friend of yours doesn't show up any time soon." She cackled, then disappeared.  
  
"Oh, no! What do I do now?" Remy was quite afraid. He checked his watch. 1:17pm. The team on mission should arrive back around 7:30pm. The team carrying Wolverine, Beast, Colosus... Remy gulped. This was going to be a long week.  
  
Sorry, had to do soem plot advancement. And I used some quotes from a few of Mae West's movies. Review, ya'll! Please! BTW, More Remy-lovin' action next installment! Love you all, Blimey The Toad   
  
Also, you'll soon find out the reason it doesn't work on Rogue yet. You'll see...  
  



	3. Rogue's Problem, and Wolvie's Return: N...

The Day That Gambit Was Irresistable III-The Return Of Wolverine  
  
Gambit paced the hall nervously. He didn't want to venture to far away from Rogue in case  
she woke up any time soon; However, he needed to find out where Mae West was before the rest   
of the team-gulp, the larger men of the team-returned. He shuddered. He begged that Rogue   
would protect him. Then his mind wandered to why she was not affected by his super-charm.   
*Hmm* he thought, *Perhaps she loves me so much she is unaffected by something as trivial as   
pure lust.* He heard the voice of Mae West laughing in his head. *Yes, hun, you just keep on   
thinking that.* He was a tad peeved at his newly discovered great grandma. She wasn't really   
very nice, he found out, and he had no idea where she was. Until he figured that out, he had   
to maintain a distance from everyone. Except Rogue. He smiled to himself. At least he had her...  
  
*Mumble* "Remy? Remy?" He heard Rogue calling his name, and rushed back inside to come to her   
aid. However, something was weird about her voice. What was it...?  
  
"Where have you been? I was worried about you, Remy. I had absolutely *no* idea. I was bloody   
frantic!"  
His jaw dropped, and his eyes went wide. His lovely southern belle had suddenly turned British   
sounding. He had an idea that Mama West was up to this. How did she contain such power?  
  
*But Remy, dear* she called to his head. *This is not my doing.* He gulped. She was a vicious  
lady, but as far as he had seen, she didn't lie. Why had Rogue suddenly turned so pompous-  
sounding then? Yet another question he should find out an answer too... all he needed was more  
time. However...  
  
"Remy! Oh, dear! What ever has happened to my voice? This is a preposterous predicament!"   
Well, at least she realized what was wrong. However, she was beginning to get a tad tiffed at   
her voice. She didn't seem to like it too much. "By the way, my young chap, whatever became of   
that Mae West figure that was here a moment ago?"  
  
"Uh... she my gran'ma. Great gran'ma, act'ally. Some kinda charm power family secret blah  
blah blah that isn' really lookin' in my favor too much, neh? So... how you feelin', chere?"  
  
"What? I feel grand, I suppose... oh, you mean my new voice! Well, frankly I don't know   
*what* to make of it!" She looked like she was considering something a moment, then spoke again  
to Gambit. "I don't suppose, chap, that you could teach me to sound like me? I mean, just so  
as not to raise suspicion among our fellow X-Men... what was that you said? Ah, yes... neh?"  
  
This didn't seem like too bad of an idea, at least until he figured out how to find Mae West.   
Until he could get over this whole in love with Gambit thing, Rogue was his only link to the   
outside world. And he set off to teach her how to sound southern.   
  
**********  
  
Rogue just couldn't get it. Gambit tried his hardest to sound Mississipian, however his cajuny   
self just kept pooping out, and Rogue came out sounding like some sort of hick cajun doing a   
really bad british accent. She finally got frustrated and dove out of the window into the   
sky. Gambit hadn't eaten in what seemed like forever, so he decided to take a chance and go   
downstairs to the kitchen. However, he forgot to check his watch... which now showed the time   
as 8:45pm.   
  
Gambit strutted throught he kitchen, not seeing anyone, and went straight for the fridge. He   
opened it up and began digging through the contents, hoping to find some ham... or corn. A   
few rooms away, a short, stocky man sniffed at the air and got a feeling which he'd never felt   
for this particular scent before. A certain desire to... *Logan, watch it, man! You've been   
hanging around Scott too much. Certainly I don't feel anything for the *cajun*! If I do, it's   
his fault... it has to be. Better go kick his butt.* As his mind wandered to thoughts of   
Gambit's butt in a non-kicking way, Logan got even angrier at himself, but more so at Gambit for  
making him feel it. He quickly made his way to the kitchen to beat the poor unsuspecting Gambit  
down.  
  
Gad... yes, I know I promised more Gambit-lovin' action this chapter, but I did some more plot   
stuff instead, so HAH! Anyways, I PROMISE this time, though... next chapter. Yep. Plus,   
sorry about Rogue... I couldn't help it. I just wanted to write a british accent, so I threw   
in a plot twist. Sorry... well, who do you think did it? Do you know?!?! I don't... yet. Or  
do I? You won't know until next chapter... also, review. Please? With butter and cheese and  
bacon bits (hold the chives) on top? I beg of thou! Anyways... do you hate what I've done   
with it? Any ideas? Let me know in a what? A review! (or an e-mail... whichever is fine...)  



	4. Logan Knows All, And Gambit Should Be Ve...

The Day Gambit Was Irresistable-Part 4  
Author: Blimey The Toad  
Situation: Gambit's control over his charm power is screwed up due to the interference of his mother, Mae West. Rogue, however, is unaffected for some reason, and now has a britosh accent. Why? We'll see soon. And Logan is disturbed by his attraction to Gambit, and plans to take it out on him.  
Thanks all you reviewers! I much love you!  
  
Gambit pulled out a bowl, milk, and box of new Galactic Crunch, a new cereal from Captain Crunch that tastes exactly like Captain Crunch, but with different shapes. He began to pour the cereal into the bowl when he heard footsteps behind him. He turned to come face to face with a peeved looking Logan. He gulped very noticably, but tried to play it off.  
  
"Why you so angry, homme? Surely Gambit no do nothin' wrong, eh?"  
Logan growled and stated his question quite honestly. "I'm attracted to you and I want to know why, damnit."  
Gambit fiddled with his shirt buttons, and tried to answer.  
  
"Uh... Logan... umm... Wolverine, homme... I... well, you see... aw, crap. Well, my charm power be on da fritz." He looked down, almost ashamed looking, feeling dumb for not remembering the team would be in, feeling dumber for being so speechless.   
Logan relaxed a bit. "Is that all? Thank God, you weenie. I thought... nevermind what I thought. I think I can control it if I try really hard. Hit me if I get too close... alright?"  
"Yeah... dat fine. Dat great."  
"Good. Now, why is your charm power so f*cked up? IS this the same with all of your powers? Have any of the others noticed?"  
Gambit took a deep breath and recounted the story.  
  
**********  
  
"Rogue is now *WHAT*? When the hell did she turn british?"  
"Gambit no know. She just... did."  
"And Mae West, of all people, is your biological great-grandma? I should have guessed. And you have no idea where she is? At all? Well, I guess I could help you out." Logan placed his hand on Remy's leg and gently squeezed. Remy jumped up and asked Logan to try a bit harder. An incredibly embarressed Logan, now beet red, balled up his fist and swung at Gambit, making contact with a sickening *crack*. Even if it wasn't Remy's fault, Wolvie sure as hell wasn't about to let it slide. He picked up the tall cajun-type man, and carried him upstairs to his room. He laid Gambit out on his bed, but smelled something sour, a familiar and unwelcome scent. Perhaps this was the root of Gambit's problems.  
  
**********  
  
Gambit finally woke up to see Logan hoovering above him, and excited look on his face. "Uh... you're doing it again, Logan." Logan looked confusedly at Gambit, then answered. "No, Gambit. I was just trying to wake you up. I'm looking pretty excited because I think I know what's the matter!"  
"What, my power can finally be put into check!"  
"No, with Rogue sounding british. Did you ever stop to consider she may not *be* Rogue?"  
"What? But she seemed as confused as I was. She didn't show the slightest signs of lying-"  
"She may not be lying; at least not intentionally. She's being truthful about what she knows."  
"What da hell you talking about?"  
Logan began telling Gambit his assessment of the current situation.   
  
Yeah, short. I'm tired. When I have more written, I'll post. It's 2am, I have to be in class at 7:30am, and need some sleep somewhere between here and there, so this is all for now. Sorry.  
  
Do you like, dislike, dig, diss, what? Review, my daft comrades! But don't worry-God loves even the daft. 


	5. And The Story Goes On

Time For A Song:  
  
I sing "Who do I own?" You sing "Noone!"   
  
"Who do I own?" (your part) "Who do I own?" (your part)   
  
Good job, you guys! Now who does own them? Speak up. Yes, very good! Marvel! If anyone sues me, despite the fact that I make nada from my creation, Santa will not look kindly upon you come Christmas Eve. And don't noone want dat. Have a great day, and enjoy!  
  
**********  
  
And now for something completely different:  
  
Chapter 5-And The Story Goes On  
  
"You see," stated Logan, "it makes perfect sense. Rogue-well, the british one, anyways-is a clone! Most likely of Sinister's creation."  
  
"NOOO!"   
  
"What's the matter, gumbo? You think I'm wrong? I'm never wrong." Logan stuck out the claws on his right hand for emphasis. He growled softly.  
  
"Non, homme. I trust you and all, but... if dis be a Rogue clone of Sinister's, den where da real Rouge? Prob'ly wit' Sinister!" *sob*  
  
Logan patted in shoulder and tried to comfort him as best as he could without getting too close. "It's alright, Gambit. There's other fish in the sea-like myself, for instance..."  
  
Gambit broke away from the contact with Wolverine and walloped him in the chin. "Logan, snap out of it, homme!" He seemed to be becoming more irresistable by the minute.   
  
"Damn, that was close. Thanks Gambit. Anyways, let's go find Rogue... maybe the clone can help us on our quest." Gambit decided it was unwise to make any comments on how goofy Logan just sounded, so he just followed him up to clone-Rogue's room.  
  
**********  
  
*knock knock*  
"Wait just a minute, dah-ling. I am on my way."  
"Oh, hello Gambit, hello Wolverine. How may I be of service to you this evening?"  
"Well, Rogue, we got ourselves some disturbin' business to discuss with you..."  
  
**********  
  
Clone-Rogue was seriously pissed at being created in a lab by a madman, so she decided to accompany Logan and Gambit on their journey to find Rogue. Sadly, though, she didn't remember anything about her past with Sinister, so she had no leads on where they might find him. However, when they got Jean to do a scan, she caught mental glimpses of a blue-scaled woman with bright red hair...  
  
**********  
  
Elsewhere...  
  
"Mystique, Ah told ya before, Ah told ya a million times-Ah won't work for ya! Leave me alone, please, for once in m'damn life!"  
  
"Shut up, Rogue. I do it because I love you. So you will give in!"  
  
Rogue just lay in the bed, strapped down, with no idea of where she was. She just hoped that Remy would be able to track her down.  
  
**********  
  
In the Blackbird...  
  
'Dis been a real weird day. An' ta t'ink dat 'bout a diarrhea I had last Thanksgiving was tha worse thing coulda happen t'me...' He tried to forget that god-awful week when he kept himself locked in his room. The rest of the team thought it was depression. They had no idea.  
  
'Damn. He's still kinda attractive. We gotta solve this mystery, and quick. Can't stand to think one more second about his long, slender, shapely legs and... agh! Boobs, boobs, boobs...'  
  
'How on earth did I end up in such a predicament? Why would anyone want to put my mind into such a body? Just wait until I get my hands on that bastard Sinister and that zany blue-scaled lady. Oh, dear heavens, I broke a bloody nail!'  
  
"How you guys all doin', non? Good?" Both Clone-Rogue and Wolverine glared at him. "I was just tryin' ta break da silence. Give me a break..."  
  
"Well, I think that" (soft lips... boobs boobs boobs) "it's a damn good thing" (luscious ass... boobs boobs boobs) "that Jeannie" (Jean's boobs, Jean's boobs, Jean's boobs) "found Mystique so easy with Cerebro. We gotta get yer" (strong back, cute smile... big, round, firm boobs) "powers back under control."   
  
"That and KILL SINISTER!" Both Gambit and Wolverine looked at Clone-Rogue in a whole new, quite frightening light. They decided to be quiet the rest of the trip.  
  
**********  
  
Okay, it's short and it's been a really long time since I've posted... but I just got over some god-awful writer's block, and just finished final's in school and graduated from high school yesterday, and have been working mega-overtime at work so I can move into my own apartment in July, so I've been a bit busy. But now school is over, and I swear I will post more often. Especially since my dad got me a computer for a graduation present, and so I don't have to use my grandparent's computer all the time. It's not as funny as it could have been, but I had to get a chapter out. Sorry. But review none-the-less, or else I'll sic Clone-Rogue on you... later, mein comrades! Oh, wait! Hold on... no Mae West this chapter (obviously) but she will make another appearence next chapter! I swear! 


End file.
